Love

For me, there are plenty of reasons to make the  journey, but it all boils down to one certainty: the most important thing we could do there was fall in love. We didn’t journey to feel guilty about how much we take for granted and we didn’t travel to feel a deeper anger about the injustices of our culture and world. We went to fall in love, and it’s that love that moves us beyond guilt and anger into real change – real conversion. Iguess it’s this love that I’m try to make sense of right now (I’ve givenup trying to control it). I can say in genuine faith that I fell in love, andthat I was loved in return. For this love to retain any semblance of authenticity, I’ve got to change the way I live. I’m called to live here and now in Omaha, and am doing my best to discern what choices I can make, and what conversions they are calling me to make. This is what people do when they are in love.

- Dan J.

Touched, Blessed, and Grateful

One of the first things that I would like to say is how impressed I was with the young people who were on the trip. You are light-years ahead of where I was when I was your age in terms of insight, com- passion, spirituality & just plain having your head on straight! I can't help but wonder how you were able to get where you are at such a young age. I am sure your parents must have had something to do with it, you also need to give yourselves some credit, and of course God had to have been there leading the way, since - all good things come from God - and you, my friends, are good! Abby - I can't help but giggle every time I think of you walking into the meeting & seeing mostly people your parent's age! I remember so clearly being your age, & I would have thought the same thing - only I'm not sure I would have had the courage to stay, & most of all sign up for the trip.

It is hard to know where to begin when it comes to the people of Guatemala. I learned so much from them - even though we did not speak a single word to each other directly. We were greeted with gra-ciousness & hospitality that I have not experienced before. I think part of the reason we were so touched by this treatment is that we did not "earn it" or "deserve it", it was just given to us - for free, no strings attached, and no less - from people we had never met before & may not ever meet again!!

So, then I wonder, why was I born in the United States & not Guatemala (or somewhere else for that matter)?? There is absolutely no logical reason that I know of to answer that question. And this has been a recurring thought since I have returned form our trip. We, as human beings are exactly the same - except we were born in two totally different parts of the world. And, we had absolutely nothing to do with that - it just happened that way.

I thought that we were going there to give something to the people of Guatemala. In fact what happened is that we received far more than what we gave. It takes awhile to process this and then to be able to articulate how this happened. But I will say that I feel truly Touched, Blessed and Grateful from having had this opportunity & to have met some of the people from Guatemala and also my fellow missionaries - you are all a Blessing!

- Pam B.

Holy Ground

The most spiritual experience I had took place on top of a Mayan pyramid, our second day in Guatemala. Fr. Zuerlein led us in a reflection by reading the following prayer:

 Loving God, We believe you live among us and the place where you are is Holy Ground. We know you love all peoples and that their ways and lands are also Holy. Help us to discover all your wonders in their faith, their lives and stories. Send us Your Spirit, and we will listen, learn and meet you in your Holy Ground. Amen

This prayer set the tone for me for the rest of our mission. I was truly stepping out of my comfort zone and putting all my trust in God. I had no earthly idea what I was doing in Guatemala. I was apprehensive about meeting and living with a Guatemalan family. Setting there on top of that pyramid I realized we are all brothers and sisters in Christ and that this piece of earth is just as special to God as our little piece is in Nebraska. I was able to let go of my fears and embrace whatever God had planned for me, and what a gift that turned out to be.

- Jeanine K.

Light a Candle & Pray

One day I was talking to a friend she began to tell me about her experience of living in Guatemala. She said that in the center of each town is the church, typically made of stone. Near the altar the people of the village light candles for their prayer intentions. After lighting a candle, it is tipped sideways to allow hot wax to drip on the floor, just enough to secure the candle so it will burn without falling over. My friend said that when she went to the church at night, it often seemed as if there were one hundred candles burning, all representing the prayers and deep faith of these beautiful people. Her story spoke volumes to me.

There was a time in my life in which everything I knew to be true about myself was challenged. It was also during this time that prayer changed completely for me. Rote prayers and familiar ways of praying gave me little satisfaction, however I found myself drawn to lighting candles. There was something comforting about the flame that reminded me of the light God could bring to the dark places in my life. The candle, burning for hours at a time, symbolized my unending prayer to God to accompany me on this journey and help me find my way to peace. Each time I lit a match and touched the flame to the wick, I saw an image of a Hispanic woman in my mind. She wore a long skirt and her shoulders were covered with a shawl. She was kneeling, with her body bent toward the ground, but as the wick caught fire, she lifted her head and arms upward.

Recently I attended an informational meeting about a mission trip that our Archdiocese was sponsoring to Guatemala. I went because I was curious to learn about this trip, to see if perhaps I had something to offer and if God was calling me to give of myself. As I listened to others speak, my thoughts returned to that time in my life ten years earlier, when I longed to be connected to these very people. Then another thought came to mind. Perhaps this trip is not about giving, but rather receiving. Perhaps God is inviting me for a totally different reason than I had thought. Maybe he is saying, “Come, Laura, and experience firsthand what you so longed for at that difficult time in your life. Come and see the churches, light the candles, talk to the people who know me in the depths of their hearts. I will pour out my love for you through these people so that you, too, will know me in the depths of your heart. I will weave your lives and stories together in a way that will change you forever. ” Perhaps this trip is about affirmation more than anything else. Perhaps it is one step closer to entering this mystery we call God.

- Laura B.

Reflections and Insights

I do not consider myself much of a journalist. I live in the moment and then process my experiences by reflecting on them, talking about them, and sometimes praying or dreaming about them. But rarely do I write my thoughts down. Perhaps I feel it takes too long...too much time away from new experiences to be lived. Also, being a bit of a perfectionist, I often feel I cannot capture the right words to accurately convey my experiences and accompanying emotions in something so permanent as the written word. But I feel compelled to try to share with you the experience of the mission trip I took with IXIM. I want to share with you the muscle of the work we did and heart of the love we shared.

Work day with the Disciples of the Good Shepherd, dinner at their home For three hours in the morning heat, I worked alongside Magloris, an 18-year old Disciple, cleaning out a soon-to-be room in their new facility and hauling in dirt to level the floor. Magloris is a spitfire of a gal. She has the self-confidence and leadership qualities to rule the nation of Guatemala, if not only to bring Christ back to her remote community four hours away when her training is complete. All morning I anticipated meeting another disciple, Ramona, who remained preparing for the evening’s events. The staff at my school is sponsoring Ramona, providing financial and spiritual support for her education in this program. Ann and I were invited to share an explanation of the sponsorship program at the presentation in the evening. I was honored to do so and presented Ramona with gifts and hugs on behalf of my co-workers. Ramona and other Disciples danced and sang songs to us.

An insight today: No doubt about it, I was meant to be here. I have a special place in this mission experience.

Arrival in San Sebastian A four-hour bus ride brought us to the municipality of San Sebastian where a welcome beyond words was in store for us. Hydrangea flower petals blanketed the main street of the town and Guatemalans by the hundreds stood by, watching, clapping, singing, smiling at us odd-looking gringos. A woman allowed me the honor of carrying her child as we paraded from the outskirts of town to the church. From the look of pride on her face, I could have been the president or the pope holding her babe. Perhaps in plain, ordinary me, she saw Jesus. I can only hope.

An insight today: Jesus still walks this land. We are his hands and feet.

Work in the school We rode a truck back into San Sebastian for the work of the day: teaching lessons in the parish school. In the days before, I helped organized small groups to visit classes from grades kindergarten through sixth grade. We taught them games, some English, tooth-brushing, juggling, and other things. It was truly an invigorating experience to share our high-energy activities with students who primarily sit at desks, dictating what the teacher reads from the one textbook available to the 25 to 55 students in a room.

In the afternoon, we returned “home” and lived life with our host families. Tomas led Tami, me, and other family members and visitors on a long walk through Hiss (pronounced eese), a section of the mountain near of San Sebastian, a “suburb” of sorts. It is obvious how proud he is of his land and his community.

It was on this walk that I fell ill. I was feeling dizzy and nauseous. Quickly plans were changed and Tami packed up my things and loaded the back of the pickup. As Sergio and Kenny walked me toward the pickup, weakness overcame me and I had to lie down. . Sergio, Lorenzo, and Kenny, in fierce concern over my condition, were speaking excitedly in rapid Spanish and were carrying me to the pickup truck. In this moment of time, these men had the arms of Jesus, lifting me to safety. In the cab of the pickup, Lorenzo, navigated the windy, bumpy roads as quickly as he dared to get me back to the parish. He was the Spirit guiding my path. Alma, comforted me and reminded me to breathe and relax, which I somehow understood, even though she could only speak to me in Spanish. She was the presence of Mary, constantly praying and caring for her children, the Church. In the parish facility, I was taken to a bed and Dr. Chris was summoned. As I waited, Fr. Damien remained with me, listened to my woes, and reassured me. Despite all my physical agony, I felt a perfect calm in his presence. In Damien that night, I encountered God the Father. Chris arrived and examined me with skill and patience and she suggested I begin a regimen of Leviquin. She shared a room with me that night, rather than returning to her family’s home. She brought me breakfast and lunch in bed the next day. It was easy to see Jesus in her. In less than 24 hours, I was feeling about 95% back to normal, which seemed a miracle to me. This experience, as miserable as it was physically, was a blessing. In my sickness, I encountered God in a very real, very personal way, through the loving care of people, Guatemalans and Americans alike, who are the Church of God.

An insight today: I may have come on this mission with the intention to be of service to others, but God wanted me to be served as well, and thus receive the great gift of his love.

Work day in San Sebastian, clinic and painting projects last night with our families I was assigned the role of translator for Jean, the pharmacist. Imagine that—me serving as a translator! Luckily, instructions for medication use required fairly simple language. I got good at saying, “Toma una tableta dos veces cada dia para tres dias.” (Take one tablet two times each day for three days.)

An insight today: My role in the clinic reminded me of a saying of the late Fr. Tom O’Brien: God does not call the qualified; he qualifies the called.

Closing Mass and farewell fiesta In the liturgy, I saw the light, so to speak, regarding the point of this mission for me. The last line of the gospel was, “The kingdom of God is at hand.” There, in that humble church filled to capacity on a Wednesday evening, God’s kingdom became true to me in way more real than ever before.

We, the people of all nations and all creeds are building the kingdom as we work side by side by the stove or in the field, when we lift up another too weak to walk, as we hold hands and pray the Lord’s Prayer in any language. At the end of mass, as a formal thank you was expressed to the community and a gift was presented on behalf of our group, I cried and cried, overwhelmed with joy and gratitude to God for including me in so grand a mission, to be a member of his Church, of his family. We celebrated the fellowship of Church with a night of dancing.

An insight today: Let us build the city of God! May our tears be turned into dancing!

Travel to Guatemala City I sat on the bus with my new Guatemalan friend, Alfredo, who speaks a grand total of, perhaps, 20 English words. This provided a great opportunity for me to work on my Spanish and, more importantly, spend good quality time with a true friend I may never see again. Being that I only know a limited number of Spanish verbs, often forget how to conjugate them, and really don’t have a grasp on the past or future tenses, our conversation options were fairly restricted. I finally fell into “a groove” though when I thought to ask him his favorite everything: color, animal, type of music, famous person, etc. We ultimately came to favorite song. He told me the title of the Christian rock song. I was sure I understood the translation, yet was baffled by the title. I probed him with questions for clarification. By verbo, did he mean verb, an action word? Yes. Did he really mean sustantivo, a noun, a thing. Yes. The song: Jesus es Verbo no Sustantivo. Translation: Jesus is a Verb, not a Noun. How true.

An insight today: To be Christ (the noun) to the world, we must do as Christ did (the verb).

A closing insight: I am a different person because of what I experienced in Guatemala. My life will not return back to normal. I will live life anew with a broader view of Church, a deeper relationship with God, and a greater love for his people.

- Stephanie S.